Say+Yes

=Right off the top let me be clear that there needs to be a large degree of common sense to go along with what I’m about to say. And since I’m coming at you, in this case, as an educator and a coach, perhaps you can think about all of this in that context. However I firmly believe that like so many things in sport it aptly applies to the way we live. With that…=

= Say yes to everything. Try it out. Accept all offers. Go along with the plan. Support someone else’s dream. The fact that you are probably thinking this to be an impractical and unrealistic way of being speaks volumes about the way we live. Say “yes”; “right”; “sure”; “absolutely”; “I will”; “okay”; “of course”; “YES”. Cultivate all the ways you can imagine to express affirmation. When the answer to all questions is yes, you enter a new world, a world of action, possibility, and adventure. Human beings long to connect, to be apart of something larger than themselves. Yes glues us together and allows us to dream together. Yes starts things rolling, gets the juices flowing. Yes can get us into trouble but trouble often isn’t so bad when we are in it together. Yes allows people with little history together to create something… to connect. Safety lies in knowing people are going along with you. Making others feel safe can only lead to a safer environment for us all. Life is too short to argue over details. Seize an idea and go with it. Don’t confuse this with being a mindless pleaser just pandering to whoever is in charge. This is where the common sense thing kicks in. But is so bad to err on the side of yes? Saying yes is an act of courage and optimism; it allows you to share control not lose it. It makes others happy and we should know by now that happiness comes back to you three-fold. Yes expands your world. Yes lets you take chances. Yes puts you out there. Always say yes if someone asks for help and you can give it. Take notice of who benefits as we say yes to life. = = = = Saying yes and following through with action prevents you from committing that cardinal sin - blocking. Blocking comes in many forms; it is a way of trying to control the situation instead of accepting it. We block when we say no, when we have a better idea, when we change the subject, when we correct the speaker, when we fail to listen, listen with our own agenda, when we worry about our image or when we simply ignore the situation. Saying no is the most common way we attempt to control the future. For many of us the habit is so ingrained that we don’t notice we are doing it. We are not only experienced at blocking others but we commonly block ourselves. “I’m bad from the foul line… I miss lay-ups… I miss these shots, I should pass off”. The lightning fast repartee that we have with ourselves, self talk, is usually not based in yes. Blocking is often cleverly disguised as the critical or academic perspective. Finding fault is its hallmark. It is so much safer to focus an all the problems. It sets us up nicely for failure… for the “I told you so” position. It gives us the illusion of controlling the future by appearing to having expected the negative outcome all along. Is that the kind of control we should be cultivating in ourselves and the people around us? A sophisticated blocker may even appear to be agreeing by offering the “yes but” response. Try substituting “yes and” for “yes but”… it’s a good start. = = = = Agreeing with an idea, observation or instruction begins the process. Embrace it with your whole being. Not looking for an underlying motive or personal slight. Just take it with a firm “yes” and run with it. Running with the information in a positive direction is what makes things happen… goals are realized. Avoiding this next step is a form of blocking. Using your own interpretation… your “yes but” response in action. An act of faith, faith in the people you have surrounded yourself with, faith in their dreams, faith in your own dreams allows you to act and act to your fullest potential. Yes. = = = = The rule of yes calls upon our capacity to envision, to create new and positive images. This yes invites us to find out what is right about the situation, what is good about an offer, what is worthy in a proposal. Exercising the yes muscle builds optimism. However, we sensibly understand that the practice of affirmation is not a guarantee of outcomes. Saying yes to life will not banish problems or promise eternal success. A positive perspective is a constructive one, however, and easier on those around us. The yes road has no guarantees and it may not always be the one of least resistance. However the resistance will not be of your own making. And chances are good you will not find yourself alone on that road. Yes. =